My Ass Still Hurts!

It’s been 1 year and 4 months since I broke my ass.  I suppose I could say coccyx bone but let’s face it,  coccyx doesn’t sound much better than ass and ass is easier to spell.

I have a lift chair.  It’s meant for old people, lazy ass people and cripple people like me. Actually, I probably fit into all three categories.  The following photo is not of me but it gives you an idea of what a lift chair does.  My daughter bought it for me.

customer_demo1

After I lay back in the chair for an hour or so my ass hurts.  I can usually alleviate some of the pain by rotating ass cheeks.  I’ve typed the word ass 8 times so far.  LMAO!!!

Surgery is also a consideration for the problem. It’s called a coccygectomy. Make sure to consider all of the risks of the surgery. Current publications of medical research (since 2000) have noted that even after undergoing the surgery as many as 1 out of every 3 patients may have pain that is still not relieved. Also, almost 20% of coccygectomy surgeries may be complicated by infections (requiring repeat surgery in 15% of patients who have the coccygectomy surgery). Some patients have postoperative pain (pain after surgery) that lasts as long as one year. Patients may be at risk for prolapse (sagging) of the pelvic floor.

The following drawing is not obscene.  It is just downright disgusting.

coccyx-surgery

I guess I just talked myself out of having ass surgery.  I think I’ll just have to deal with a little pain in the ass.

Did you know there is an old Norse deity named Ass?  The things you find out when you research your ass.



32 Comments (+add yours?)

  1. Little Miss
    May 04, 2009 @ 21:35:51

    Thanks for that, Joan. I needed a good laugh. You crack me up.

    Reply

    • joanharvest
      May 04, 2009 @ 21:49:42

      I’m happy I could give you a good laugh. I think ass surgery is not in my future.

      Reply

      • Brenda
        May 21, 2010 @ 17:28:17

        I had the surgery to remove my tail bone the the best thing I have done I can sit with no pain I might be one of the lucky one. I have been in pain for 3 year. I can sit now with out pain. I pick out a good Bone Dr. the head dr. I feel like I have not had a surgery the day I got hom.

        Reply

    • dawntilla
      Dec 03, 2009 @ 18:43:07

      Thanks so much for sharing. I’m glad i’m not the only broke ass person out there. I fell on mine trying to play on the playground with the kids 3 months ago. I have a cracked sacrum and the tip of my coccyx is floating around somewhere in my posterior region. Its good to see someone else finds the humor in the situation, i would have cracked up if it did not hurt so much to laugh.

      Reply

      • joanharvest
        Dec 03, 2009 @ 21:26:13

        My ass still hurts to this day especially in a movie theater where you can’t really squirm around to get it to feel better. Sorry you broke yours. I can attest to the fact that it hurts like hell. I was going to say “I hope I don’t do that again” but I guess you can only break it once. At least there is something good to say about it.

        Reply

  2. thebeadden
    May 04, 2009 @ 21:43:31

    Holy crap! I think you made the right choice. That looks mighty scary.

    But the chair. How sweet of Sarah to do that. You know, it’s so nice to hear (and read) about how close some families are and how lucky we are to have them!

    I think this new addition on her way into this world, is in for a pretty special life when she arrives, being a part of your family!

    Reply

    • joanharvest
      May 04, 2009 @ 21:48:18

      I have to agree with you about families being close. My family is definitely close to each other. Family always comes first. Sarah is way too good to me. I am so fortunate to have her for a daughter.

      Reply

  3. theramblinghousewife
    May 05, 2009 @ 06:21:58

    Your daughter is such an angel in the way that she takes care of you! (I think it is in the female’s nature to be so nurturing…) As the Mom, of three boys…I have a feeling that “I’m screwed!!!” (LOL)…But let’s hope not!!!!😉

    Reply

  4. javajunkee
    May 05, 2009 @ 07:02:44

    you literally CRACKED me up that time!
    Ok..my first thought on that ass surgery is the first shit afterwards..and so that would be a NO to the surgery for me.

    That chair looks like fun though. Does it have lots of buttons and levers?🙂

    Reply

  5. The Vinyl Villager
    May 05, 2009 @ 09:24:10

    I feel bad for laughing as much as I am…

    but how on Earth would you sit, walk, or sleep after such an ass surgery?

    Reply

  6. Doraz
    May 05, 2009 @ 10:15:58

    Joan,
    Good decision NOT to have the surgery! It does not look like it would be that fun and even work 100%! I would rather have to deal with it…the chair would help,,,,slowly! Your great sense of humor helps, right? I loved this post! You are quite the writer!!🙂

    Reply

  7. teeni
    May 05, 2009 @ 11:13:08

    Yikes – that surgery looks worse than the condition itself. I hope your ass pain has dramatically diminished since you broke it though. I also have to agree with your other readers that your daughter is awesome. I’m so glad you have her – that chair was a wonderful and thoughtful gift!

    Reply

  8. Just a Mom
    May 05, 2009 @ 11:17:51

    After looking at that picture I would learn to live with a pain in the ass too! Oh wait I’m married, I already live with a pain in the ass!🙂

    Reply

    • Joy
      May 05, 2009 @ 11:38:13

      You F-ing crack me up JAM!

      Joan, Joan, Joan…I’m laughing my ASS offffff!!! Oh gawd!! You are so funny. I love the chair though. I feel like checking into one for my husband. It looks like a cool deal.

      A little pain in the ass….oh, man, I’m laughing.

      Reply

  9. starlaschat
    May 05, 2009 @ 11:51:37

    I’m sorry your Ass still hurts Joan. Time heals all wounds? Including Asses. Hopefully.;+).

    Reply

  10. birdpress
    May 05, 2009 @ 15:23:05

    My pain in the ass is in the living room watching a movie.

    JJ, of course, went and thought of something I had not. Could you imagine? Seriously. 😮

    Reply

  11. mrssnell
    May 05, 2009 @ 15:26:57

    I feel bad laughing about your ass, Joan, because it sounds awfully painful.
    But you just made is so damn funny! LMAO!

    Reply

  12. kilax
    May 05, 2009 @ 17:36:31

    Oh my gosh! That last pic is kind of making me laugh. And kind of making me look away. Feel better!

    Reply

  13. Romi
    May 05, 2009 @ 18:54:49

    So sorry about your ass! And those images…right before dinner….oh my….hahaha…
    Hope your ass stops being a pain in the ass!!😉

    Reply

  14. museditions
    May 06, 2009 @ 02:04:53

    You are among the few people in the UNIVERSE who would post THAT picture (except for ass surgeons). I’m about to go to bed! You are giving me nightmares and I’m not asleep yet!
    I remember your ass was hurting in the hospital after your (non-ass) surgery. Now I know why. I would think that as you continue to heal from the other thing, and continue in WW, you will relieve pressure and heal better. But what do I know? I broke my toe over a month ago (I didn’t think I broke it but it turns out I did) and it’s still swollen, but getting better. I hope it still doesn’t hurt in a year, and that your rump feels better soon!🙂

    Reply

  15. lupusranting
    May 06, 2009 @ 16:46:31

    OMG that is soooo painful to look at. Who was the idiot that came up with such a stupid surgery … and to think insurance carriers would PAY for that? Anyway, I broke my ass last year too. Had to tough it out, which took forever. No wonder my subconscious didn’t want to see the doctor about a broken ass.

    Hope your ass feels better 🙂

    Reply

  16. mrsvierkant
    May 06, 2009 @ 19:47:06

    Ummm… Eww? Now I suddenly remembered why I am a teacher, not an ass doctor. LOL. 😉

    Reply

  17. joann
    May 07, 2009 @ 10:46:39

    LMAO – H HA HA ! You really crack me up !

    This code may work – I hope I did it right – It’s a joke about ,what else? ASS ! LOL !

    Reply

  18. joann
    May 07, 2009 @ 10:47:20

    NOPE ! THAT DID’NT GO THROUGH – OH WELL ..

    Reply

  19. writer chick
    May 07, 2009 @ 11:49:46

    Hey Joanie,
    I’m loving that chair and I don’t even have a broken ass – just a lazy one. I can see why you’d pass on the surgery – man that looks way too radical.

    What does this Norse god do, the one called Ass?

    Annie🙂

    Reply

  20. Jen512
    May 07, 2009 @ 23:38:12

    Oh man, just looking at those pictures make my ass hurt! My best friend just had a 3 inch tumor removed from her rectum, and then had to wait two more weeks to find out if it was cancer (can you imagine?) Thank GOD it was not cancer! The recovery was a pain in the butt…pun intended.

    Reply

  21. Emerald
    May 08, 2009 @ 20:35:28

    I’d be saying coccyx all the time! I’m sure it’s no fun at all to break it, but haven’t you seen Napolean Dynamite? You’re clearly as rad as his way-cool grandma, you could definitely get away with “yeah, broke my coccyx, out dunebugging after feeding my llama.” I hope it doesn’t hurt too much at least, and I agree on the not-so-much-with-the-surgery-idea. I say stick with the cool chair!

    Reply

  22. Marsha
    Apr 25, 2010 @ 17:39:10

    It’s obvious from some of the comments people have left that they have no idea just how much tailbone pain hurts! I’ve lived with it for 4 years now and have finally scheduled the surgery so I can live like a normal person again. For someone to question why anyone would do the surgery or why insurance would cover it is just, pardon the pun, assinine! I hope you never have to go through the pain those of us with ass pain have suffered.

    Reply

    • joanharvest
      Apr 25, 2010 @ 20:39:49

      I totally agree with you. My ass hurts to this day. I can’t sit for long in certain chairs. I am 60 years old and at this point in time I don ‘t want to be bothered with surgery. I have already had one new knee and need another and that’s enough surgery for me but I truly don’t think that most people can imagine how much it hurts.

      Reply

  23. MT
    Apr 30, 2010 @ 20:11:29

    I had 2 inches removed from my tailbone in 2005. Mine was in the shape of a C so sitting was very painful. I made sure I took my pain meds after the surgery right on time and I had no pain. However, I could not sit, lay on my back or stomach for 4-5 weeks. I laid on my sides. I was back at my desk job sitting for 8 hours after 7 weeks. I am very glad I had the surgery. i no longer have pain. It was totally worth it to me. Best of luck to you!!!

    Reply

  24. Brenda
    May 22, 2010 @ 11:38:09

    Second day after my Coccygectomy surgery feeling pretty good today I can get up with out pain. The 2 inches cuts I do take pain pill but I am able to sit with not pain. I a so glad I had the surgery I been in pain for two year. I came home from the hospital feeling good was no sleeply. Hours for surgery a hour for recovery and 15 min in my room then I was on my way to the drug then home.

    Reply

  25. Marsha
    Jun 25, 2010 @ 16:27:46

    Had my surgery a few days ago and can already tell it’s going to mean a new, better life for me! Yes, it’s painful and kind of yucky to go through but it’s worth it! Can’t wait to sit like a normal person again!

    Reply

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