Why I Don’t Want To Work in a Nursing Home!

I’ve been at  “the Home”  for 3 days.  Just long enough to realize I could never work in a  “Home”.  I have to give these people a lot of credit.  I could never do what they do.  You have to be physically strong, mentally strong and crazy to work here. If you’re not crazy you have to have a lot of patience and really like your fellow man or woman.

I thought they still dressed like this.  I was wrong.


Imagine coming into my room and seeing me laying on the bed. I tell you I need a bedpan.  Your job is to stuff it under my broken butt without hurting me, wait until I am done and then clean my ass.  Now doesn’t that sound like a satisfying  job?


They not only clean us up but they serve our meals.  They even offer to put the cream in our coffee.   When they are not doing these jobs they are sticking needles in arms, taking blood pressure  and making sure we have non skid socks  so we don’t break our asses, again.

I think the worst part of the job for these workers is they have to be nice to rude, whiny, know-it-all people. The things some of these patients say to the nurses and aides shocks me.

I myself just spill water on the floor all day and then ring the buzzer so they can clean it up.  I don’t want them to feel useless. To be truthful,  I actually did spill stuff today more times than I would like to admit.  The guy taking care of our section cleaned it up with a smile.  I’m in rehab heaven at this place.

Truthfully, I have been treated so well  I might decide to stay.  A few of the nurses and aides remember me from the last time I stayed here.  I must have made an impression. The question is was it good or bad?


I haven’t had one single person be rude to me.  Everyone seems to be genuinely happy with their work.  Oh jeebus, I hope there  isn’t some Stepford Wives thing going on here.  You know, the owners drug or hypnotize all the employees to be perfect nurses and aides. That’s why they always smile when they empty the bedpans. OMG,  maybe I should stay awake tonight.

Wait they’re coming…………



22 Comments (+add yours?)

  1. JavaQueen
    Mar 18, 2009 @ 03:36:48

    Heee-heeee-heeeee! Oh Joanie! I’m so happy they are taking such fine care of you! How are you healing?


  2. kilax
    Mar 18, 2009 @ 06:47:54

    That is so wonderful that you are surrounded by warm and friendly staff. I bet that will make your recovery even speedier!


  3. trishatruly
    Mar 18, 2009 @ 07:12:58

    Your explanation of the POD PEOPLE is the ONLY explanation that makes sense, Joan. How else could one do all that with a smile? Be very, very careful. If you start thinking that it might be nice to fluff someone’s pillow or refill a water pitcher.. call Sarah to come get you RIGHT AWAY!

    be afraid so afraid be afraid don’t close your eyes stay awake be quiet don’t let them know you’re on to them ssshhhh…………


  4. starlaschat
    Mar 18, 2009 @ 09:17:27

    I actually did that as a job once. It was a small place only 6 people. We did everything including cook which was funny because at that time I had no idea how to cook. The nurse in charge said please make dinner for 6 I looked at the package of chicken sitting on the counter. I said to her” and How would you like this prepared. ” I don’t know how I survived that job. I did learn a lot about patience and unconditional Love. That was the good thing and how to cook a little bit. ;+).


  5. Joy
    Mar 18, 2009 @ 09:25:50

    I’m with trishatruly. If you start feeling the need to do any of those things, call for help RIGHT AWAY!!

    I’m so glad your sense of humor is till there. You gave me a belly laugh with these antics of yours. It does take a special person to do this and I’m not one of them. I hate “whiny.”

    Seriously, how are you feeling? Are you up and getting around yet?


  6. boundandgags
    Mar 18, 2009 @ 10:14:22

    I can attest they are not, in fact, pod people. Odd people? Yep. That’s my girlfriends specialty since getting out of nursing school. They are, pretty much, very nice people with vicious senses of humor. Pointed mainly at themselves. I’ve never heard them got at a patient. I’m always amazed at how much and for how long they can care.

    The job and the care they have to give is the reason I never ask my girlfriend how her day was. No matter what happens in my day, I can never match up to what she did. I used to ask, then she hit me with something (and I’d thought I’d heard it all) that made me tell her, no offense, but I’m never going to ask how your day was again.


  7. theramblinghousewife
    Mar 18, 2009 @ 14:37:49

    Those workers are definitely saints! 🙂

    Hope you’re healing quickly!


  8. javajunkee
    Mar 18, 2009 @ 19:51:13

    ROFLMAO!! Only YOU!!! I can see you spilling water just so somebody can come clean it up..I’m betting it’s a good looking male attendant? 😉

    I am still waiting for your ass to be home where it belongs!


  9. Just a Mom
    Mar 19, 2009 @ 09:39:17

    I love the “Bedpan Instruction” cartoon! That was just too funny!

    I hope you are doing well and watch out for those Stepford Nurses!


  10. Red
    Mar 19, 2009 @ 11:05:33

    hehe … at least they’re taking good care of you ..
    and not like trying to smother you with a pillow or give you extra pills so you’ll sleep longer or something ..
    bed pans scare me.


  11. Mister Swifter
    Mar 19, 2009 @ 21:08:49

    Hey Red,

    Bed pans should only scare you if you are the one removing them!!!


    • joanharvest
      Mar 22, 2009 @ 17:38:32

      HEY MR. Swifter!!!!

      You are the most awesome of everyone who has helped to take care of me at rehab. All kidding aside, this guy always has a smile and I want to thank him publicly for being so dedicated to his job. He also brings me good snacks!

      What more could a new knee patient ask for?


  12. croneandbearit
    Mar 20, 2009 @ 12:28:06

    Only you could be at “the home” and be this funny. Please can we have some of your meds? Sending get well hugs!


  13. starlaschat
    Mar 20, 2009 @ 12:44:38

    Just checkin in on ya. I hope there feeding you OK there. Nice to have someone do the cooking. Trying to look on the bright side. I hope it doesn’t hurt too much.


  14. Emerald
    Mar 20, 2009 @ 19:35:48

    That’s so great that you’ve got lovely nurses around you, who needs crabbiness when you’re trying to mend your knee with minimal ass-pain?

    If they weren’t nice I’d recommend stashing grape juice or something and playing a fun prank with the bedpan 😉


  15. mrsvierkant
    Mar 20, 2009 @ 22:44:38

    I worked in a nursing home over 20 years ago. I think it was some of the harder work that I’ve ever done. I enjoyed many of the residents I worked with though, and have fond memories of many of them.


  16. allison
    Mar 21, 2009 @ 09:08:52

    Hmm. It sounds a hell of a lot better than the “home” my grandmother was in. At that place, nobody seemed to work. But they did have some awfully nice candy stripers who made things a lot better and happier for their inmates.


  17. starlaschat
    Mar 21, 2009 @ 17:36:15

    Hi Joan, Just thinking about you. Hope all is well with your knee and that your healing well. I wonder if at home yet? anyway. Spring is right around the corner it was 54* today amazing so exciting a little warm sun.


  18. James
    Mar 21, 2009 @ 17:55:18

    Hi Joan. I didn’t know your were “home bound”. I’m sorry to read this. I hope your getting better. I know what you mean about the nursing staff. My step grand dad was an Alzheimer’s patient and I helped my grandmother change his diaper once because the home nurse didn’t come to the house on weekend’s. I applaud these folks for the work they do.


  19. teeni
    Mar 22, 2009 @ 18:06:45

    I’m so glad you are being well taken care of. I think all hell would break loose if we had to go down there and start handing out some canings if they didn’t take care of our Joan. 🙂 I love reading your posts and am so glad you are in good spirits.


  20. Josh
    Apr 06, 2009 @ 09:09:17

    My wife works in a nursing home, as a Nurse’s aide. Soon to be going to Nursing school…

    I feel bad for her.


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