I Just Applied For An Office Job –By Mistake!

I got an E-mail this morning from some company asking me to give a reference for one of my daughter’s best friends. I’ve known this girl since she was 5 years old.  I gave her a glowing reference which was well deserved.  I think the company was some kind of job finding company that I filled out the reference for.

At the end of the form, they asked if I might be looking for a job. I suddenly thought to myself  “Joan, you should get a part time job at home  working on the computer.”  So I filled in “Yes”.  They asked  a few other questions and I was finished.  Then they thanked me for applying for the same job my daughter’s friend applied for–a 9-5 office job. OOPS!!!

I couldn’t deal with an office job even if I wasn’t disabled.  Cubicles kill people.  They are so claustrophobic.  Even if cubicles aren’t involved I’m thinking at this point in time working would kill me.  Can you imagine me at work flinging my cane around and calling everyone “dumbass”?

Actually, the only kind of computer work I would like to do is research.  I wouldn’t want to do billing or any crap like that. I just like looking up stuff.  You know, give me a subject and I look up stuff about it.  I doubt that there are many people out there looking for someone to look up stuff.

I’m curious to see if they will call me though. That would be funny.  I doubt I will be doing any other work beside my kitchen slave cook work that I do here.  I need time for blogging and looking stuff up in the dictionary.

Dictionary   STUFF

  1. The material out of which something is made or formed; substance.
  2. The essential substance or elements; essence: “We are such stuff/As dreams are made on” (Shakespeare).
  3. Informal.
    1. Unspecified material: Put that stuff over there.
    2. Household or personal articles considered as a group.
    3. Worthless objects.
  4. Slang. Specific talk or actions: Don’t give me that stuff about being tired.
  5. Sports.
    1. The control a player has over a ball, especially to give it spin, English, curve, or speed.
    2. The spin, English, curve, or speed imparted to a ball: “where we could watch the stuff, mainly curves, that the pitchers were putting on the ball” (James Henry Gray).
  6. Basketball. A dunk shot.
  7. Special capability: The team really showed its stuff and won the championship.
  8. Chiefly British. Woven material, especially woolens.
  9. Slang. Money; cash.
  10. Slang. A drug, especially one that is illegal or habit-forming.

v., stuffed, stuff·ing, stuffs. v.tr.

    1. To pack (a container) tightly; cram: stuff a Christmas stocking.
    2. To block (a passage); plug: stuff a crack with caulking.
    3. Basketball. To block (a shot or an opponent who is shooting), especially before the ball leaves the shooter’s hands.
    1. To place forcefully into a container or space; thrust: stuffed laundry into the bag.
    2. Sports. To shoot (a ball or puck) forcefully into the goal from close range.
    3. Basketball. To dunk (the ball).
    1. To fill with an appropriate stuffing: stuff a pillow.
    2. To fill (an animal skin) to restore its natural form for mounting or display.
  1. To cram with food.
  2. To fill (the mind): His head is stuffed with silly notions.
  3. To put fraudulent votes into (a ballot box).
  4. To apply a preservative and softening agent to (leather).

v.intr.

To overeat; gorge.

idioms:

stuff it Vulgar Slang.

  1. Used as an intensive to express extreme anger, frustration, or disgust.

stuff (one’s) face Slang.

  1. To eat greedily.

[Middle English, from Old French estoffe, from estoffer, to equip, of Germanic origin.]

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14 Comments (+add yours?)

  1. Just a Mom
    Oct 29, 2008 @ 11:10:04

    I applied for and was hired for my current job as a mother on accident as well. I was so good at it I ended up getting the same job twice! 🙂

    I went and did that job purposefully–twice. Now I’m having second thoughts. I can’t seem to quit that job. I actually did try to quit last week. I told my daughter and she said “You can’t quit, you’re the one that holds everything together.” That sure put me in my place. And that’s a true story.

    Reply

  2. threeboys1mommy
    Oct 29, 2008 @ 12:03:08

    Cubicles do kill Joanie, your right about that. 😦

    I have mild claustrophobia. I know I couldn’t be in a cubicle all day. I had to have an MRI and had to take valium first. I’d have to take valium everyday before I went to work in a cubicle and then I would fall asleep.

    Reply

  3. Emerald
    Oct 29, 2008 @ 12:11:57

    Thankfully my office job does not involve a cubicle. It involves a large, oddly shaped office that I share with Talea 😀 Sure, we’re surrounded by idiots most of the time, but we pass the days by belting out tunes and mocking people when they’re not around. I don’t know if I could swing a cubicle type existence.

    My sister and I drive around town just so we can mock people. Why is that so much fun? It seems mean but I love to do it. Oh well, I’m sure people are mocking me with my cane and my fat ass.

    Reply

  4. Joy
    Oct 29, 2008 @ 12:16:22

    You are to funny Joan. Ooopss….That make me really laugh. I can’t see you doing an office job. Or me either! As I’ve gotten older, I’ve gotten bolder. I would be able to kiss up anymore.

    I love STUFF!!!!

    Isn’t that the truth. When I was young I would just do as I was told at work. Now, if anyone tried to tell me what to do I’m afraid of what would come out of my mouth ( by mistake, of course).

    Reply

  5. javajunkee
    Oct 29, 2008 @ 13:38:17

    Ok now see first if I were hired where cubicles are…there would be a rearranging party while the rest of the cubbie dwellers were gone. I’d be setting them up like a maze. I would so freaking be fired on my first day.

    but seriously send them my name..if they fly me out there and give me living /moving expenses I’m all over it!

    You’d only be fired if they could find you in the maze. What a great idea. You would love living here on the Cape. It is so beautiful. Plus I’m here. 😉

    Reply

  6. Hannah
    Oct 29, 2008 @ 14:31:16

    You know, I never really minded my cubicle. Our office was pretty open-plan, and there was always a colleague close by to chat with. Felxi-hours meant I could start & finish when I liked, which definitely helped. I wouldn’t like a 9-5 job, because then you get the problem of sitting in traffic to get there & back!

    You would be an awesome researcher! Perhaps you will find some amazing research job you can do at home, part-time. That would be COOL.

    Flexi-hours sounds cool. I’d like that. Cubicles that are open aren’t too bad. It’s the ones with 6 foot walls I wouldn’t like. I’m going to keep my eyes open for a researching job. You never know.

    Reply

  7. teeni
    Oct 29, 2008 @ 17:47:20

    I don’t like cubicles because it is dehumanizing. Why on earth do we put people in stalls like they were horses or something? It is just so wrong. I don’t know what is wrong with just having normal offices with real walls. I think companies think they are saving money with all these mobile cubicle partitions but I’ve worked in real offices and in cubicles and I’ve seen more time and money expended on the cubicles because there are always people moving and equipment being moved. They didn’t expend so much time on that when it was real offices because they couldn’t! Also, there seems to be a lot more turnaround in personnel in places with cubicles so I would imagine a lot of money is lost there as well. Oops. I’m posting in your comments again. Sorry, Joan. I think you’d be a great researcher. I learn tons every time I come over here. I never knew so much about “stuff” before. 😯

    Ha! Ha! You are always welcome to post in my comments. I agree with your point too. One thing I know about “stuff”. I have way too much of it.

    Reply

  8. mrsvierkant
    Oct 29, 2008 @ 20:49:07

    Cubicles: Not for me either. ick… I have to move and interact, so I guess it is a good thing that I teach school. LOL about accidentally applying for a job.

    Envisioning you going crazy in a cubicle… Thanks for the giggle. 😀

    After reading your blog for so long I can’t imagine you teaching 20 kids in a cubicle. Now, that would be really claustrophobic. I’ll LMAO if these job people contact me. I just might go on the interview for laughs and bring my video camera.

    Reply

  9. thebeadden
    Oct 29, 2008 @ 23:05:14

    I couldn’t see you in a cubicle, Joan. You just seem to be too free-spirited to be contained. But funny about applying by mistake. 🙂

    You are so right on. That’s why I owned my own business for 25 years. I wanted to do what I want when I want which is why I am also divorced.

    Reply

  10. Peter Parkour
    Oct 30, 2008 @ 00:07:17

    It’s clear to me that you have the right STUFF. 😉 If you find that job, let me know. I’ll put in a application too. 😀

    If I have to work I would much rather do it at home in my own time. I’ll give you a heads up if I ever find anything. 😉

    Reply

  11. trishatruly
    Oct 30, 2008 @ 08:31:37

    So if they call tell them to “stuff it” cause stuff like that is stressful and it might make you stuff your face or smoke some stuff that’s illegal just to get through all the stuff you’d have to do, like maybe stuffing envelopes or stuff like that!

    Wow, you know your “Stuff”!!!!!! I stuffed cheap Christmas stockings when I was a kid. That’s enough stuffing for me. 🙂

    Reply

  12. The Vinyl Villager
    Oct 30, 2008 @ 10:19:37

    “Can you imagine me at work flinging my cane around and calling everyone “dumbass”?”

    YES! And I love it! When can you start??

    If it’s in a cubicle –never. If it’s on a cripple cart and I can just drive around an office waving my cane and calling people dumbass–Today!!!

    Reply

  13. soapboxdiva
    Oct 31, 2008 @ 14:05:22

    Okay, so anytime I want to know more about something, but don’t have time to look it all up, I can ask you, and you will research it for me? LOL, can I call it ‘in training for employment’ so I won’t have to pay you? Just curious…….

    Ha! Ha! That’s not such a bad idea. At least that way I could figure out if I am actually good at it. I might find out I suck at it and have to find some other work.

    BTW, welcome. Hope to see you here again.

    Reply

  14. thegirlfromtheghetto
    Oct 31, 2008 @ 19:00:54

    I work in a cubicle, and if it weren’t for the internet browsing while on the job I’d die! My work is toxic and killing me for sure.

    Only you could apply for a job while giving a reference at the same time, ha ha ha!!! that is fantastic!

    Reply

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